Oh my gosh adulting! I have
navigated some major life

changes many times and had no
guide. I was in it before I knew

how to get through it. So there
was so much fall out that I

could have avoided had I had
better resources; had I've been

better equipped. So this topic
is near and dear to my heart.

What I'm hoping that you will
get out of this is some help in

how to navigate radical life
changes. So when I say radical

life changes, what I'm actually
talking about is major life

changes. And when you think
about what those are, major life

changes are things that are
controllable, and some are not

controllable. They are things
like separation, marriage,

divorce, deaths in the family,
imprisonment, injury, illness,

job loss, retirement, they span
a lot of areas. It spans

familiar areas, financial,
health related topics, they are

the social aspects of living
life. And we could go on and on

and on. What I would like to do
for the conversation we're going

to have today is just to focus
on the changes that you initiate

when you are on your path to
build a better life. Because

those are things that although
none of this is light, right,

all of this is heavy, is even
heavier. Based on some factors,

like what's been going on in
your family's history, I just

want to spend a couple minutes
today, thinking about the impact

of the changes that you are
going to initiate, the ones that

you have initiated, because
you're on your way to building a

better life. So the term that
this took when I started

researching this topic that I
wasn't actually prepared to take

was one around mental health.

And I mean, I get it, I totally
get it as somebody who's gone

through so many things. And I am
wholeheartedly a believer in

mental health professionals, I
myself have had many therapists

in my life, as an individual,
I've also had marriage therapy.

And so I understand the value
and the power there. But what I

didn't think about as I was
getting prepared for this was

the impact on our mental health
from a guilt, shame and

uncertainty standpoint, and
thinking about initiating a

change, there are certainly a
lot of emotions that go into it.

So these were not a foreign
concepts. You know, I think

about you making a major career
change, being in a place of

employment, and thinking about
leaving to become an

entrepreneur or leaving to go
and work for another company.

You know, there are some some
pieces that go along with that

decision that you have to work
through. I know when I was

thinking about leaving an
employer some time ago to go

back out into entrepreneurship,
you know, the things that I had

to consider was the financial
impact on my family, obviously,

children who are athletes, you
know, husband and wanting to

know how this income change was
going to affect all of these

people, the family that are
around me, as I'm going through

these changes, all of that
brought up some feelings that I

hadn't considered outside of,
you know, the good things,

right. So going out to work for
myself and become an

entrepreneur means freedom. It
means a lot of great things. But

it also means that if I don't
succeed there, my family is

going to suffer, right? If I
don't succeed, and I've

sacrificed time away from my
family, then I'm going to feel

terrible about that. So there
was this impact that I had to

work through in order to make
that change. The thing about the

mental health piece is that a
lot of this is outside of our

control, right? Like we talk
about mindset all the time in my

friend groups, and it's a great
ideal, but putting that into

practice is a completely
different topic.

So Understanding that when these
things happen, even when you

initiate them, you're going to
want to have some tools in place

to be able to navigate them for
your mental health's sake. There

is also a need for you to check
in with your resiliency. Because

at the end of the day, we can't
predict the future. And anytime

we're making radical life
changes, we know that there are

going to be things that are
outside of our control, there

are going to be people affected,
in most cases, by your decision.

So having the wherewithal to
know that you will get through

all of these unexpected turns is
important. So let's talk about

what's needed. When you are
navigating radical change, there

are four things that I want to
spend a little more time talking

about today. And one of them is
a plan.

Now, I realize that not everyone
is comfortable planning.I have a

couple sisters who are like
"Let's go." And that's it,

they've made the decision. And
they are on to executing on such

decision. I tend to be a
planner. So I'm going to think

things through try to figure out
all of the angles, I'm

considering all of the key
players, the stakeholders. It

can take months or years where
I'm running through what the

effects are going be. Call it a
control thing. Sure that makes

sense. But I advocate making a
plan, even when you know that

there are going to be
uncontrollables. Because I think

that there should be some
responsibility around the

decisions you're making. Right?

I also think that having a plan
will help you identify some of

the needs that are going to come
up as you make these

adjustments, right, if you are,
whether again, it's a career

related decision, whether it is
relationship related decision,

you want to identify what your
needs are going to be and maybe

the needs around you, as you
make those decisions.

Second thing that's needed is
for you to really understand how

to tap into your power and how
to find strength.The thing about

making major decisions is that
there are going to be so many

times when you doubt yourself,
oh my gosh, do I know this story

very well. And as you are doing
the thing, you are sometimes

thinking about backing out of
it, because sometimes you're hit

with so many different factors
that you didn't consider it can

be overwhelming. I also know
that there are those who just

kind of they freeze up, they
just kind of get stuck as

they're navigating through
something new and different. So

understand where your power base
is. What does that mean? That

means that you've got to have
some things in place. So that

when doubt seeks seeps in, and
it typically does, when you're

feeling you know, like you
should rescind the offer or take

a step back or just kind of go
back to what's comfortable. You

don't do that. So you've planned
for what it's going to take and

and whether that is making sure
you've got your squad around you

the people that are going to
support you through it, whether

it means that you've got to line
up some things financially,

whether it means that you have
to build some relationships that

don't exist today. Maybe there
are some professionals that

you're going to need to employ
to be able to get you through

this transition. Think about
what that looks like and think

about putting that in place
before you navigate.

The other thing that's needed is
reorientation. So this happens

quite a bit for example, as
entrepreneurs make the

transition from career to
entrepreneurship. I've done it

several times myself and one of
the things that I've always had

to rely on is my discipline.

Going from someone saying you
need to be here at this time,

every single day to an
environment where your days are

yours, you can do whatever you
want to do. And there is no body

asking you to do anything. I
mean, you are you are working

this thing as you see fit. You
are reorienting how you work.

The same can be said when it
comes to relationships whether

you are walking into a
relationship or You're walking

away from a relationship, there
is a pivot that you have to

navigate, there are
accommodations that you now need

to think about that didn't exist
before.

The fourth thing is, this is
kind of kind of broad, but it's

getting help versus staying
stuck. So I said this because

when it comes to navigating,
life changes, (and I've talked

about maybe asking
professionals) what I mean by

getting help is understanding,
like who you are. There is a

self assessment that needs to
happen, when you are making a

decision to make a change. You
know, as I've been talking about

entrepreneurship, as an example,
what I've found when I've

coached entrepreneurs, and I've
been doing it for decades, is

that most entrepreneurs have a
talent in an area. And they've

gotten some kind of feedback
that this is a talent that they

should take on the road, so to
speak, or take to the

marketplace. And so they go, and
they are good at a thing, they

have a talent, but that does not
translate 100% into owning a

business. As a matter of fact,
what typically happens in a

small business is that the small
business owner oriented towards

the operational side of their
business, so they make the

thing, they create the thing.

But there are other sides of
that company that are needed,

there is marketing, the thing,
there is handling the finances

of that enterprise. So they walk
out, and they're very confident

in what they can do, and don't
necessarily account for all of

the other areas that they cannot
do. And that self assessment is

necessary in terms of making
sure that that that change is

positive and it is successful
and sustainable. And I would

say, I would challenge you, if
you're thinking about that kind

of change to be honest with
yourself. On the relationship

side of the equation, that the
same is true, you know, there

are those of us who have been in
relationships for so long, for

so much of our adult lives. The
idea of being a single person,

not in a relationship is
something that you've really got

to take account for. Because
it's different.

So these are some things to
think about as you're navigate.

What I want to close with is
planting the seed for what's on

the other side of change. And
again, we're talking about

intentional changes, that you've
decided to initiate because you

want to build a better life, if
you are in that spot. And as

you're navigating that
understand that the other side

of this transition is one where
you have your well being in

mind, and that you can be
successful at whatever the next

area is that you decide to
participate in. There is a

reason we are called out of one
thing and into another thing.

And I just want you to be
mindful of that. And these

desires we have they are they're
not coming out of nowhere. But

honestly, in most cases, they're
coming out of a place of

alignment, because somehow we've
gotten out of alignment. So I

would just encourage you to
navigate this with your eyes

wide open. I've learned that
visualization, manifestation,

gratitude practices, journaling,
there are a lot of tools and

ways to move through this
journey. I also have leaned most

heavily into my faith. And it
has been the number one source

of power and strength for me. I
hope that you have something in

place that will help you
navigate as well. So I hope

you're empowered. I hope that
you know that you are not alone

as you navigate. Don't be
scared. We're here for you.

We've got your back. This is a
community and you can do this.

Sound good?